Virginia Friesen
Plan Fail: The Christmas Reunion That Wasn't

We were home the WHOLE month of December and it was good.

We continued walking five miles a day, praying for snow, and preparing for our family Christmas reunion: the first one in New England since 2015 and the first all being together for Christmas since 2019.

We had very high expectations.

Ministry events in December included Engagement Matters, the Patriots women’s study, and LOTS of counseling, but that left plenty of time for decorating the house inside and out, getting together with friends, wrapping and sending packages, sewing Christmas jammies, making gingerbread houses, and preparing for our long-awaited reunion which was to commence the 22nd of December.

Plan Fail: The Christmas Reunion That Wasn't
Virginia Friesen
Around the Country in 22 Days

Since my last post on Dec. 27, we’ve only been home eight days.

Maybe that contributes to me forgetting that when I last wrote, my reflections ended with Engagement Matters (EM), which was held Dec. 4–5, and not after Christmas, which the blog post date would indicate.
Whatever the reasons, before I write about our most recent last three weeks—which literally took us to the four corners of our great nation—we must finish December. Strangely, that seems SO long ago already. But what fun to sift back through my December photo library and have many sweet memories surface.

Around the Country in 22 Days
Virginia Friesen
A Bit of Heaven on Earth

It happened.

The “decades birthday-family reunion” celebration, postponed for a full year, is now in the books, but even more deeply, in our hearts.

It was uncertain until an hour before the six flying from Oakland were to depart due to two lost Covid tests, but mercifully, new tests were done at 6 am, the results of which were registered less than 60 minutes prior to boarding.

The trip was on.

A Bit of Heaven on Earth
Virginia Friesen
More Than a Cookbook

It was a sweltering summer day in Louisiana. My 8-year-old self stood in the kitchen of my paternal grandparents’ home in Shreveport, watching with fascination as Grandma Collins stirred the hot pot of boiling figs, on their way to becoming preserves. With sweat running down her brow, just beneath the thin brown elastic that kept her hair net in place over her thinning curly hair, she turned to me and said, “You know, Virginia, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” With that piece of wisdom pronounced, she simultaneously clicked her cheek and winked her eye at her wide-eyed granddaughter, leaving an unforgettable impression.

More Than a Cookbook
Paul and Virginia
On the Move (Part 2)

My plans to write “Part 2” have been derailed by the maelstrom of craziness driven by the Coronavirus Pandemic. I’m taking a break from all Coronavirus talk to take us back a month ago, when "Life as We Always Knew It” was all we really knew. What a difference a month has made!!

After speaking in Maine for the Valentine’s event, we flew to California for the annual ProAthletes Outreach “Increase” conference, which we fronted by spending two days with my dear mama. As per usual, I “made" her go on a field trip each day because getting out is good for everyone. Off to Coronado we went for Paul to get his every 4–6 week haircut by his favorite barber, and while he was getting shorn, my mom and I rolled through town. This photo was taken by accidental tourists, who just happened to be from Lexington, MA!! Small world moment. The time with my mom is never enough but we’re always so grateful for any time we have with her.

On the Move (Part 2)

Hola y adiós!

Hola y adiós!

Hola!!

Buenas días desde México!! I write today, on Mother’s Day, from a little plumbing-less cabin in Rancho Abierto, the YWAM Family DTS base in “Nowhere, Mexico.” Obviously, we are somewhere—somewhere where God is doing a great work—but this little base has no town name attached to it, hence, “Nowhere.” This is our second year in a row speaking here and since we’re here for two weeks this time, I’m finding “down time” on this Sabbath to log an update on our crazy good life, privileged to proclaim the hope of the gospel as seen in marriage and family.

Island Life

Island Life

The past 7 weeks in numbers:

47 days on the road

35 degrees - lowest temp

85 degrees - highest temp

345 miles walked/hiked

18,000 air miles flown

25 talks given

50 hours of counseling


We’ve just returned from almost seven weeks on the road (or in the air) and were welcomed home by a large stack of (mostly) recyclable mail, temps that were 55 degrees lower than the average of the past weeks, and leafless trees and brown earth.

It was very apparent we weren’t in Hawaii anymore.

Refreshed!

Refreshed!

In an incredible stroke of good fortune, we were home for The Blizzard of 2022.

Obviously not everyone shares our view of seeing this as a good thing, but for these Californian bred kids, snow is still a joy-bringer. #truth

So we took advantage of it between counseling appointments and preparations for the HIM Marriage Conference, which followed the blizzard weekend. Snow tubing while school was in session gave us access to a “no-lines” hill and we maximized the potential. It never gets old . . . at least, not yet. I also squeezed in a couple of cross country skiing adventures, made easily possible by our proximity to conservation land which abuts our property. No driving necessary. Blessed by perfect conditions, the stillness and serenity of skiing through silent fields of white was soul-refreshing.

Around the Country in 22 Days

Around the Country in 22 Days

Since my last post on Dec. 27, we’ve only been home eight days.

Maybe that contributes to me forgetting that when I last wrote, my reflections ended with Engagement Matters (EM), which was held Dec. 4–5, and not after Christmas, which the blog post date would indicate.
Whatever the reasons, before I write about our most recent last three weeks—which literally took us to the four corners of our great nation—we must finish December. Strangely, that seems SO long ago already. But what fun to sift back through my December photo library and have many sweet memories surface.

From Sea to Shining Sea

From Sea to Shining Sea

It wasn’t beginning to look like Christmas back when this photo was snapped on October 28! In fact, at that point, it seemed like Christmas was a VERY long way off.

And here we are. Christmas was here. And now it’s in our rear view mirror.

We’re continually being confronted with the reality that the older we get, the faster time goes.

Here, There, and Everywhere

Here, There, and Everywhere

In the past two months, we have made six trips to California, two to Maryland, one to Virginia, one to Pennsylvania, one to Tennessee, and one to Georgia. Of the 23 days we slept in our own bed (out of the past 62 days), we have had seven sets of houseguests, many full days of counseling, spoken at four weekend conferences, celebrated two God-honoring weddings, walked about 400 miles, gone apple picking and leaf peeping, bought and processed our annual supply of fresh raspberries for jam making, and been with all of our children and grandchildren at various points along the way.

Peace in the Chaos

Peace in the Chaos

Peace seems quite elusive as days turn into weeks, months, and almost two years of our pandemic ridden world. Contradictory beliefs, reports, statistics, advice, protocols, and professional voices undermine our confidence, elevate our fears, and divide our communities. “Unprecedented” is overused, leaving all of us wondering if we’ll ever resume our “precedented” life being unmasked, without having hand sanitizer as "standard operating elixir", and standing physically close to one another.

Celebrating Summer!!

Celebrating Summer!!

You can feel it in the air. It’s palpable when you’re in the mix of people, outdoors, interacting. At the beach. In parks. At celebrations.

Our God-designed, image-bearing, relational selves are reawakening after a long draught of imposed isolation and it is enlivening. Literally. Statistically, this past year-and-a-half has taken a toll on us far beyond the scope of the virus itself. In fact, the collateral damage seemingly far outpaces the Covid damage, when mental health, relational breakdowns, abuses of all kinds (from spousal and child abuse to substances and addictions), financial ruin, academic setbacks, emerging addictions related to technology, etc., are tallied.

Prayerfully, the worst is behind us and we can begin rebuilding with hopefully more wisdom and awareness of what really counts.

A Bit of Heaven on Earth

A Bit of Heaven on Earth

It happened.

The “decades birthday-family reunion” celebration, postponed for a full year, is now in the books, but even more deeply, in our hearts.

It was uncertain until an hour before the six flying from Oakland were to depart due to two lost Covid tests, but mercifully, new tests were done at 6 am, the results of which were registered less than 60 minutes prior to boarding.

The trip was on.

Adios and Aloha

Adios and Aloha

Following swiftly on the heels of the one-year anniversary of my mama’s death, we held our second virtual Engagement Matters.

Because engagement matters.

As much as we resisted this the idea of doing an online version of this seminal weekend, the silver lining became evident quickly: it was attended by people in Egypt, the UK, Norway, Iceland, NY, PA, OH, NC, CA, and MA. We’re pretty sure all of them wouldn’t have been able to attend in person. 😀

It's been one year . . .

It's been one year . . .

Today it’s been a year since my mama took her last breath on earth.

Though it was truly a mercy when her increasingly labored breathing came to an end, the eerie stillness which followed 3:49 am in the darkness of April 14 was surreal. Even more surreal was seeing how quickly her now non-beating heart and breathless lungs sucked the warmth of life from her earthly residence.

It was what we wanted, but simultaneously didn’t want. At 90 years and 3 months of age, she had just 18 days earlier survived a pulmonary embolism, which should have stopped her beating heart on March 28.

More Than a Cookbook

More Than a Cookbook

It was a sweltering summer day in Louisiana. My 8-year-old self stood in the kitchen of my paternal grandparents’ home in Shreveport, watching with fascination as Grandma Collins stirred the hot pot of boiling figs, on their way to becoming preserves. With sweat running down her brow, just beneath the thin brown elastic that kept her hair net in place over her thinning curly hair, she turned to me and said, “You know, Virginia, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” With that piece of wisdom pronounced, she simultaneously clicked her cheek and winked her eye at her wide-eyed granddaughter, leaving an unforgettable impression.

Back in the Saddle 2021

Back in the Saddle 2021

The new year got off to a relatively slow start as we remained “grounded” due to Covid. So from our home base, we continued to do a lot of counseling via Zoom as a couple, while Virginia met with a number of her clients “on the bike trail” for a “walk with a dual purpose.” The therapy was mutually beneficial as the fresh air and sunshine renewed both body and soul. We met up with a few friends in “safe” settings and continued to sort and purge various parts of our home. And we blessed as many people as we could with home made meals, breads, cookies, and jam, using recipes from or newest publication, The Family Table Cookbook.

Thankful

Thankful

“Gratitude is the heart’s memory.” (French proverb)

A plaque bearing this message was part of my birthday gift from my dear sister Laura, and it sits prominently on our buffet amidst fall decor, reminding me that during this year of unexpected crisis and hardship, gratitude is a posture of the heart. “Heart’s memory.”

I love that.

Constant companions: joy and sorrow

Constant companions: joy and sorrow

August and September seem to have vaporized, and in spite of so many of our scheduled events having been suspended, we have had remarkably full days and weeks. Though nothing is “normal,” we’re navigating this time relatively well overall, but we’re also aware that we live with an underlying presence of anxiety. Every slight sore throat, cough, or headache is immediately suspect, allayed so far with a quick temperature check and a deep, unfettered breath. We’re very thankful that though we haven’t “stopped living “ (as you’ll read), we’ve been protected in the midst of taking “calculated risks” while proactively doing all we can do to be wise. We are so very thankful for His grace, protection, and faithfulness. Morning by morning.

The New Normal? (Part 2)

The New Normal? (Part 2)

Denver!! We “rushed” to get there so we could spend the day with various friends, and even though the end of that grueling 18.5-hour-drive was tough, we were so happy we did it when just hours later, at 9 am, we met Jim and Lois for breakfast.

Theirs is a story only God could’ve written (and yes, I know that He’s in charge of all of our stories, but this one is super special.)

The New Normal? (Part 1)

The New Normal? (Part 1)

We can’t remember a time since 2003 that we’ve spent as much time at home as we have during this 2020 season of the pandemic. Admittedly at the outset, it initially seemed like it would interrupt life for a few months and then we’d be back on the road, but we know now that was wishful thinking. So here we are, 4.5 months into a very modified life, being forced to confirm this is the “new normal” for the foreseeable future.

In the midst of living a cautionary life, over the past two months we’ve managed to fly to Dallas, Texas, and San Diego, California, on two separate trips; to drive 4200 miles across country—from San Diego to Boston; to officiate two weddings and attend a third; to drive to Northern Virginia and back; and to visit (at safe distance) multiple sets of very important-to-us friends. We have masked, sanitized, met outdoors, and been prudent . . . but we have not stopped living.

Hope In the Midst of Pain

Hope In the Midst of Pain

I last wrote on April 6, predicting that my mother’s “mansion in heaven” was nearing completion for her occupancy. Eight days later, she received the key and entered her heavenly home.

Words will always fail to adequately convey the depth of gratitude my heart holds for having had the privilege of walking with her the last 11 days of her life, but I’ve been processing this for these last 7 weeks since her passing, and some of my reflections have crystallized.

Changing Times, Unchanging God

Changing Times, Unchanging God

Well this is different. Another blog, only two weeks later.

It’s obviously not just the timing of my blog that’s different.

Everything is different.

For everyone.

That’s what the “pan” in pandemic means.

As we continue to navigate these uncertain, constantly changing, unprecedented times—which will leave none of us unchanged—our prayers and hopes are vested in an unchanging God, whose assurances, presence, protection, and promises are unaffected by the coronavirus that is affecting everything else.