The towering redwood in the Dougans’ backyard.
Six weeks ago today we returned from six weeks on the road . . . and these six weeks have been marked by a birthday, an anniversary, and a funeral, with a whole lot more in between each sacred event.
Our days at home after returning March 17 were brief, and included a day of counseling, haircuts, connecting with our kids/grandkids, and mowing the lawn.
And then we were off to California. Though it didn’t make logistical sense to have crossed the nation for three short days at home, it made heart sense.
So we did.
Our time in California was also very short. Speaking for the first ever marriage retreat for Windsor Christian Church (WCC), we spent the weekend in Hopland, CA, a tiny town just north of Santa Rosa. The quaint little town hosts a 100-year-old hotel, full of charming antiquity, and the surrounding wide open spaces seem a contradiction to the reality that Hwy 101 runs right through the town. We loved exploring the area by foot, taking extra caution when crossing to the other side of the highway.
Lance Wallace (senior pastor of WCC) and his wife Jill, along with Randy and Joy Hitchcock, worked together to make this event happen. Though conflicting schedules reduced the anticipated number of attendees, we had a wonderful time interacting with those who came and by all accounts, the Wallaces and the Hitchcocks were very pleased with the weekend. We were, too.
The attendees of the first (annual?) marriage retreat for Windsor Christian Church.
Lance and Jill Wallace and Randy and Joy Hitchcock envisioned and executed this weekend conference.
An early morning view of the beautiful area surrounding Hopland.
While there, we took advantage of being close to Santa Rosa and paid our dear, almost 101-year-old friend, Rosemary Dougan, a visit. She continues to amaze us!!
Back home from California, 4 days after departing—we spent only 3 days in Fairfax, before flying to Boston to speak for a marriage conference at Freedom Hill Church in Malden.
But first, the iconic DC cherry blossoms were inching towards peak, so after getting home on a late night flight Monday, we were up very early to drive in to DC for sunrise over the blossoms. Because rain was predicted the next two days, we made the “carpe diem” decision to win the sleep argument with our bodies, and proceeded at O-dark-30 to feed our souls.
And it was worth it. Even with an only partially visible sunrise and not fully opened blossoms, it was so worth it.
Though our tired-ish looking faces confirm a level of sleep deprivation, our souls were being filled with the early morning delights.
We returned a week later, past peak, and loved seeing the Tidal Basin hosting the fallen petals.
Back to the Freedom Hill Church marriage conference, we flew to Boston the 28th of March and were hosted by our dear friends, the Amicos, for our very brief stay. The conference was Friday night and Saturday until early afternoon, and we loved partnering with this church for the first time.
But though we were new to the church, we were not new to those planning the conference. The senior pastor and his wife, Anders and Christina Eliason, were in the Christian Marriage and Family class we taught at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary back in 1997, and Nick and Christine Saia, who organized the weekend, attended Engagement Matters over 20 years ago and have made a tradition of attending the HIM marriage conference annually.
Many of those who attended were connected with us in one way or another: engagement matters, marriage conferences, family camps, etc. It was a sweet reunion from decades of ministry and we were filled with gratitude and humbled by God’s faithfulness in producing fruit through the years. All praise is His!!
Anders and Christina Eliason and Nick and Christine Saia, invested a lot in making the Freedom Hill Church’s marriage conference a success.
Dave and Monique Clourtier were at the conference; they are longtime HIM supporters and ministry partners, and we loved catching up with them.
It just happened that the National Figure Skating Championships were being held in Boston that weekend, and Paul and Kate Wylie, longtime friends since attending Engagement Matters in 1999, asked for a meet up. We were so so happy to spend a bit of time with them and their daughter Emma.
Paul and Kate Wylie and daughter Emma “just happened” to be in town while we were there for the conference and we had a sweet reunion with them.
March 30, we flew home from Boston (that still sounds strange) and spent the next week in Fairfax, largely to help Julie with the kids while Derek was on an international trip. We had some great jumps at “Flyzone,” enjoyed watching Nathan play football, and all around loved being home to catch our breath.
“Flyzone” champs!
Our young Patriot is a pretty talented quarterback.
And then, back to Boston.
Yep!!
Friday night, the 11th, we spoke at Valley Chapel in Uxbridge on on a rainy-snowy early April night. The topic? Parenting! Though the group was small, they were interactive and very appreciative of our teaching. We love partnering with this church.
Joshua and Kerrie Howard serve this congregation faithfully and contribute to it being a very healthy, vital church.
Ken and Amy Gaudet spearheaded our partnership with Valley and they, along with their son Teddy and his wife Emily, attended.
Engagement Matters was the main reason for this trip to Boston and though we shouldn’t have been surprised, we were all taken aback by the 5” of snow which fell during the night Friday and early into the day Saturday. Fortunately it didn’t stop the 12 couples from coming and we had a fabulous weekend interacting with these young, in-love couples. We were especially thankful for our serving team, starting with Matt and Beth Ide, who hosted the event, and Richard Hendricks, Carl and Cathy Blatchley, and Doug and Julie Macrae, who after an 11-year “sabbatical,” rejoined our teaching team. Their skit on marriage dynamics was very well received, as was the Ide’s presentation on finances.
We loved every minute of the weekend and are so thankful for HIM’s commitment to continuing to place a priority on this important ministry. We regularly hear from couples who even decades later affirm the value of their weekend experience.
A beautiful winter wonderland set the stage for Engagement Matters.
The Spring 2025 class”of Engagement Matters “graduates."
Doug and Julie on stage.
Doug and Julie gave very practical tips on how to be a “super” husband or wife.
Matt and Beth Ide presented on finances again and did a great job.
Again by providential planning, we “happened” to be in town for the dedication of the memorial to fallen Massachusetts State Police Officer, Tommy Devlin, which happened on Tuesday the 15th. The Devlins have been in our lives since the early 90’s and were very involved in all aspects of HIM, so it was a devastating loss for all of us when in 2020, Tommy succumbed to injuries sustained when he was hit by a distracted driver in 2018. Paul was honored to do a benediction for the service and it was such a sorrowful joy to come alongside the Devlin family in this time of honor for their beloved father and husband.
The Devlins stand by the memorial made in honor of Tommy’s 33-year career with the MA State Police.
While in Boston we received word that our very dear friend Don Hasselbeck had suffered a heart attack on April 10, and on the 14th, he was “walking with Jesus.”
Our grief has been profound, having developed a very deep relationship with Don and Betsy over the twenty years we partnered together, leading the NE Patriots’ Couples Study. We were honored to eulogize Don at his funeral on April 22. You can check that out here. It was so comforting to have time with our hosts, Grant and Emily Williams (who started the Patriots’ couples study in 1999), who live in the same neighborhood Don and Betsy moved in to in late Dec. 2024, as well as some very sweet time with Betsy. She is strong in the Lord and trusting Him in this time of unexpected grief.
Don and Betsy came alongside us in a herculean way during our move in August 2023, tirelessly packing with us for 4 days during our “move” week, and returning 3 times during the week after we moved to finish the job. We will never forget their sacrificial service to us.
Don and Betsy spoke at three of our HIM marriage conferences, but the highlight for Don was the conference of 2022. Don voraciously read and re-read Gordon MacDonald’s book, “Ordering Your Private World,” and was thrilled that Gordon and Gail were speaking at a plenary that weekend. Don spent every moment possible of that weekend picking Gordon’s brain. Don loved learning and pursued it with passion.
The 2024 HIM marriage retreat reunited the Hasselbecks and the Mankins, and introduced the Patriots veterans to our dear friends, Bill and Christi Bachman.
Grant and Emily Williams were the consummate hosts for us in Nashville.
Back from Nashville, it was a full court press to finish some Creative Memories albums in honor of Julie’s 40th birthday. If pictures paint a thousand words… sifting through hundreds of photos from the past 40 years filled my heart and mind with thousands of words, capturing delights too numerous to count. We have been so blessed.
Derek made a proper fuss in Julie’s honor, as my sister Laura and her husband David, Lisa, Paul and I joined the Johnson house for a 5-star dinner and festivities. It was a joyous evening.
This is what our dining room looked like for a few weeks …
… and pages like this were produced.
Rachel was introduced to her mother’s growing up years as she thumbed through the pages of the albums.
A delicious flourless chocolate torte was made by my sister Laura for the occasion.
And then, it was Easter!! A glorious spring day set the stage for the matchless glory of the resurrection and after a celebratory church service, we hosted Easter dinner at our home, followed by an energetic egg hunt in our backyard.
Easter service at The King’s Chapel was full of joy.
Easter dinner in our home. We love such gatherings so much!!
With Julie’s 40th, Easter Sunday, and Don’s funeral behind us, Paul and I turned our attention to celebrating our 49th anniversary on April 24. We’re both wondering how it is possible to be closing in on the half century mark of marriage, but calendars don’t lie. How grateful we are for the journey we’ve had together. In our wedding, Paul sang, “My Tribute” by Andre Crouch, which begins with, “How can I say thanks for the things you have done for me…Things so undeserved, yet you gave to prove your love for me…” We had no idea of how deeply true those words would reflect our life together back in 1976, but we do now. He is faithful!
Ah, yes…the eyelet wedding dress I made and Paul’s ruffled shirt under his polyester tux…and the hair!! Those were the days . . .
Celebrating with dinner out the night of the 24th.
A lot has been packed in to the past six weeks: a birthday, an anniversary, and a funeral…
As “My Tribute” continues, “To God be the glory for the things He has done.”
Amen!